After 3 months of blogging "DR. HONEY" , I decided to have another blog that I could dedicate to my own local readers. i.e
a Malay version blog. (That's one of the advantages of being bilingual, I guess!). Although it is a "non academic" blog in nature, compared to DR. HONEY, but it certainly would be a motivating and an aspiring one too. I hope that it would gather its own followers just like DR. HONEY, which, at this point of time, has reached more than 5,000 hit list with almost 100 entries just within 3 months! Obviously, DR. HONEY is also a motivating factor for the creation of NORA BAKRY!
I hereby proudly present you with my new blog "NORA BAKRY" (http://norabakry.blogspot.com) =>>
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Maslow's Traits of Self Actualized People
One of the foundations of transformational psychology is American psychologist and philosopher, Abraham H. Maslow's theory of human needs. Maslow (1908-1970) defines self-actualization to be "the desire for self-fulfillment, namely the tendency for him [the individual] to become actualized in what he is potentially. This tendency might be phrased as the desire to become more and more what one is, to become everything that one is capable of becoming. Maslow used the term self-actualization to describe a desire, not a driving force, that could lead to realizing one's capabilities. Maslow did not feel that self-actualization determined one's life; rather, he felt that it gave the individual a desire, or motivation to achieve budding ambitions.
Dr. Maslow summed up the concept of Self-Actualization as:
"A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write, if he is to be at peace with himself. What a man can be, he must be. This is the need we may call self-actualization ... referring to a person's desire for fulfillment, namely to the tendency to become actually what we are potentially ..."
Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs =>>
Traits of Self Actualized People
• They are realistically oriented and not threatened by the unknown. They have a superior ability to reason and to see the truth.
• They perceive and understand human nature. They accept themselves, other people, circumstances and the natural world for what they are. They are able to learn from anyone and friendly with anyone, with no regard to stereotypes.
• They are emotionally intelligent and feel no need for crippling guilt or shame. They tend to be serene, characterized by a lack of worry. They are self starters, are responsible for themselves, and own their behavior. Work becomes play and desires are in excellent accord with reason.
• They are unflappable and retain dignity amid confusion and personal misfortune, all the while remaining objective.
• They have a great deal of spontaneity and have no unnecessary inhibitions.
• The self-actualized person can be alone and not be lonely.
• They are honest and seek justice for all.
• They are autonomous and independent. Thoughts and impulses are unhampered by convention. Their ethics are autonomous and they determine their own inner moral standards.
• They have a fresh rather than stereotyped appreciation of people and appreciate the best aspects in all things. However they resist conformity to the culture. They determine their own behavior and have their own views on people and events.
• Moment to moment living for them is exciting and often exhilarating as they live their life to the full. Vibrant moments are frequent and peak experiences not unusual. Peak experiences are moments when one sees clearly what before was hidden or obscured.
• They seek wholeness; they are able to merge opposing views into a third, higher synthesis, as though the two have united; therefore, opposite forces are no longer felt as conflict. Self-actualizing people retain their childlike qualities and yet have a far-seeing wisdom.
• Their intimate relationships with specially loved people tend to be profound, sincere and long-lasting, rather than superficial.
• Their sense of humor is philosophical rather than hostile. They can laugh at themselves but never make jokes that hurt others.
• Self-actualizing people enjoy an inborn uniqueness that carries over into everything they do. Their creativity is original, inventive, uninhibited and - since they see the real and true more easily - valuable.
• Self-actualizing individuals are motivated to continual growth. They are also aware of their primary goals in life and are devoted to fulfilling them, both for their own benefit and as service to others.
According to Maslow, only a small percentage of the population reaches the level of self-actualization. It is the summit of Maslow's hierarchy of needs and the quest of reaching one's full potential as a person. Self-actualization needs are being one's true self, achieving one's highest potential, wanting knowledge and wisdom, being able to understand and accept oneself and others, being creative and appreciative of beauty in the world. A self-actualized person is happy, realistic, accepting, problem-oriented, creative, democratic, independent, and fulfilling a mission or purpose in life. Unlike lower level needs, this need is never fully satisfied; as one grows psychologically there are always new opportunities to continue to grow.
Dr. Maslow summed up the concept of Self-Actualization as:
"A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write, if he is to be at peace with himself. What a man can be, he must be. This is the need we may call self-actualization ... referring to a person's desire for fulfillment, namely to the tendency to become actually what we are potentially ..."
Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs =>>
Traits of Self Actualized People
• They are realistically oriented and not threatened by the unknown. They have a superior ability to reason and to see the truth.
• They perceive and understand human nature. They accept themselves, other people, circumstances and the natural world for what they are. They are able to learn from anyone and friendly with anyone, with no regard to stereotypes.
• They are emotionally intelligent and feel no need for crippling guilt or shame. They tend to be serene, characterized by a lack of worry. They are self starters, are responsible for themselves, and own their behavior. Work becomes play and desires are in excellent accord with reason.
• They are unflappable and retain dignity amid confusion and personal misfortune, all the while remaining objective.
• They have a great deal of spontaneity and have no unnecessary inhibitions.
• The self-actualized person can be alone and not be lonely.
• They are honest and seek justice for all.
• They are autonomous and independent. Thoughts and impulses are unhampered by convention. Their ethics are autonomous and they determine their own inner moral standards.
• They have a fresh rather than stereotyped appreciation of people and appreciate the best aspects in all things. However they resist conformity to the culture. They determine their own behavior and have their own views on people and events.
• Moment to moment living for them is exciting and often exhilarating as they live their life to the full. Vibrant moments are frequent and peak experiences not unusual. Peak experiences are moments when one sees clearly what before was hidden or obscured.
• They seek wholeness; they are able to merge opposing views into a third, higher synthesis, as though the two have united; therefore, opposite forces are no longer felt as conflict. Self-actualizing people retain their childlike qualities and yet have a far-seeing wisdom.
• Their intimate relationships with specially loved people tend to be profound, sincere and long-lasting, rather than superficial.
• Their sense of humor is philosophical rather than hostile. They can laugh at themselves but never make jokes that hurt others.
• Self-actualizing people enjoy an inborn uniqueness that carries over into everything they do. Their creativity is original, inventive, uninhibited and - since they see the real and true more easily - valuable.
• Self-actualizing individuals are motivated to continual growth. They are also aware of their primary goals in life and are devoted to fulfilling them, both for their own benefit and as service to others.
According to Maslow, only a small percentage of the population reaches the level of self-actualization. It is the summit of Maslow's hierarchy of needs and the quest of reaching one's full potential as a person. Self-actualization needs are being one's true self, achieving one's highest potential, wanting knowledge and wisdom, being able to understand and accept oneself and others, being creative and appreciative of beauty in the world. A self-actualized person is happy, realistic, accepting, problem-oriented, creative, democratic, independent, and fulfilling a mission or purpose in life. Unlike lower level needs, this need is never fully satisfied; as one grows psychologically there are always new opportunities to continue to grow.
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Living a Happy Life
Very few people believe that they are truly happy, and many feel envious of those that are, but have you ever tried to find out how to live a happy life? Here are ten ideas on how to improve your life and make yourself happier.
1. Look for the positive side of every situation. It's only human nature to look for something to complain about, and this usually means we tend to only see negatives. If you want to know how to live a happy life try looking for what's right instead of what's wrong. If you are delayed at the airport, or stuck in traffic, try to make positive use of the extra time perhaps by reading a good book or relaxing and listening to music.
2. At the end of each day, as you get into bed, take a moment to think of all the things that have been good about that day. Remember anyone that smiled at you, anything you have done that's made you feel fulfilled, and anything that's made you laugh.
3. Spend time with people you love, whether they're your friends or your family. How often do you put off going to visit people because it's a bit far to travel or you've got too much to do at home? Quality time with your loved ones is a vital ingredient in the recipe for a happy life, so don't be stingy with it.
4. Be active and get some exercise, even if it's just a brisk walk around the neighborhood. Science tells us that exercise releases endorphins in the brain; those wonderful chemicals that reduce pain and make us feel happy, so turn off the television, leave the car at home and get moving.
5. Rest, sleep and relaxation are vital elements in how to live a happy life. No matter what you do, you won't be able to enjoy it if you are exhausted or stressed out; even the smallest problems will seem like the end of the world if you're sleep deprived. Forgo that late movie and get an early night, and you will be a much more pleasant person to be around.
6. Identify goals both in your personal and working life and work towards achieving them. Having ambition and planning ways to fulfill your dreams gives you something to look forward to, and the satisfaction of reaching your targets is even better.
7. Be grateful for the little things. Recognize the things that people do for you every day. If a stranger holds the door open for you, make time to pause, smile and say a genuine thank you. If a colleague offers to make you a coffee, show you appreciate it, and make sure you return the favor once in a while.
8. Don't wish your life away by counting the hours to the weekend, or the days to your next holiday. Make the most of every moment and learn to enjoy the here and now. Do something every day that makes you happy and try to make every day memorable and unique.
9. Keep away from people that bring you down. While you're always going to hear some complaining and negativity as you go through life, spending all your time with people that grumble and find fault with everything is sure to drag you down. Surrounding yourself with positive, cheerful people is guaranteed to make your life happier.
10. Don't be afraid to have fun. It's a shame that we can't really remember what it was like to be a young child, where everything was a new and exciting adventure, and we were encouraged to play all day with no responsibilities to worry about. Try to bring a little of that childlike innocence into your every day life and just do things that make you happy without wondering what other people will think of you.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Lisa_Jaye_Murray
Friday, May 29, 2009
The Importance of Communication in a Relationship
Communication is basically the keystone on which you can build a happy relationship. It is the crucial mortar that binds the relationship together; any crack in it can actually crumble the relationship down. We are all aware of the necessity of communication in a relationship; it strengthens the bond and keeps the spark alive. But there are times when we are absolutely clueless about the facts and importance of communication in our life. This doesn’t imply that you are basically a naive person, but it only implies that you need to be more attentive towards your way of communicating with your partner in order to understand him/her better.
Good communication helps in building proper understanding between the two and that actually contributes to the development of a better and healthier relationship. The more you communicate the better clarity you develop and that actually enables you to be more familiar with the communicating approach of your partner and vice versa.
When you are into a relationship, a marriage, a commitment, you must give ample space to your partner. The first approach would be to look at yourself, your activities, your way of talking and your overall attitude towards your partner. In a marriage, people are usually dependent on their partners and there are times when they end up blaming the other for no cause at all. When the time is tougher than usual, these blaming and accusing issues creep in and that actually disturbs the alliance. In such situations, it is necessary to review one’s own activities and communicating it in the first place to the partner. You can easily blame someone else for their wrongs, but if you have to review yourself to find out your faults, things are hard-hitting. It’s not really easy to accept criticism; after all who would want to be called wrong!!
Communication doesn’t mean you just talk to the other or point out mistakes; it’s about helping one another to understand the different perspectives so as to avoid unnecessary arguments and misunderstandings.
Communication also means you must be able and willing to listen to what your partner has to say. A good listener encourages the scope of communication in their relationship, thus bringing in peace and harmony. Listening doesn’t mean just hearing the words spoken and then forgetting it altogether. It means you are paying dedicated attention to what your partner has to say. So don’t get confused. While listening, you must convey your interest in what your partner has to say. Communication in a marriage, or in any other relationship is expected to be sincere, open, patient and of course non-judgmental, if you truly want to have a successful married life.
Communicating well isn’t really complicated and can be achieved with a bit of patience and the desire to be together. You must also be able to gauge the perfect way of communicating with each other. Nothing in life happens by itself; all of us must strive to achieve things that we want and work on it with honesty. Communicating well with your partner, speaking, expressing through words and actions, listening can help in keeping the relationship alive.
Source : http://www.ezilon.com/information/article_20137.shtml
Good communication helps in building proper understanding between the two and that actually contributes to the development of a better and healthier relationship. The more you communicate the better clarity you develop and that actually enables you to be more familiar with the communicating approach of your partner and vice versa.
When you are into a relationship, a marriage, a commitment, you must give ample space to your partner. The first approach would be to look at yourself, your activities, your way of talking and your overall attitude towards your partner. In a marriage, people are usually dependent on their partners and there are times when they end up blaming the other for no cause at all. When the time is tougher than usual, these blaming and accusing issues creep in and that actually disturbs the alliance. In such situations, it is necessary to review one’s own activities and communicating it in the first place to the partner. You can easily blame someone else for their wrongs, but if you have to review yourself to find out your faults, things are hard-hitting. It’s not really easy to accept criticism; after all who would want to be called wrong!!
Communication doesn’t mean you just talk to the other or point out mistakes; it’s about helping one another to understand the different perspectives so as to avoid unnecessary arguments and misunderstandings.
Communication also means you must be able and willing to listen to what your partner has to say. A good listener encourages the scope of communication in their relationship, thus bringing in peace and harmony. Listening doesn’t mean just hearing the words spoken and then forgetting it altogether. It means you are paying dedicated attention to what your partner has to say. So don’t get confused. While listening, you must convey your interest in what your partner has to say. Communication in a marriage, or in any other relationship is expected to be sincere, open, patient and of course non-judgmental, if you truly want to have a successful married life.
Communicating well isn’t really complicated and can be achieved with a bit of patience and the desire to be together. You must also be able to gauge the perfect way of communicating with each other. Nothing in life happens by itself; all of us must strive to achieve things that we want and work on it with honesty. Communicating well with your partner, speaking, expressing through words and actions, listening can help in keeping the relationship alive.
Source : http://www.ezilon.com/information/article_20137.shtml
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
The Magical Moments
When I wrote something on "The Magic of Facebook" in my previous entry, never in my wildest dream that the magical moments could turn out to be this soon. Leez called me yesterday to inform about her working assignment in JB. So, we thought that this could be the right time for us (me, Leez and Yan) to have our "Mini Reunion"! Leez (Dr. Norliza) is now an Assistant Director at the Ministry of Education in Putrajaya while Yan (Azian) is an Executive (Finance) at Agro Bank in JB.
So, here we are...Dinner at Danga Bay! How I wish the rest of the gang could be with us here, now....recollecting our nostalgic moments together, the good old days when life is not that complicated as it is now, the fun that we've shared, our first infatuation, our secret admirers @ "mini fan club", the tireless moments of cycling to school and all around town, campings, picnics, roller skating, hiking up Maxwell Hill etc.
There's certainly a lot of catching up to do....(30 years, mind you!),..and so many questions arises that need some updated answers such as "Whatever happens to "so and so"?" "Is he/she still single/alive?" "Where are they attached to now?" "When was the last time you've seen him/her?" etc.
RECAPTURING THE MAGICAL MOMENTS
My Buddies, Leez and Yan =>>
Our Meal =>>
"Something" for them to remember me by =>>
Enjoying Our Dinner =>>
Exchanging Business Cards =>>
Window Shopping =>>
Till we meet again, Take care, dear!
From :-
So, here we are...Dinner at Danga Bay! How I wish the rest of the gang could be with us here, now....recollecting our nostalgic moments together, the good old days when life is not that complicated as it is now, the fun that we've shared, our first infatuation, our secret admirers @ "mini fan club", the tireless moments of cycling to school and all around town, campings, picnics, roller skating, hiking up Maxwell Hill etc.
There's certainly a lot of catching up to do....(30 years, mind you!),..and so many questions arises that need some updated answers such as "Whatever happens to "so and so"?" "Is he/she still single/alive?" "Where are they attached to now?" "When was the last time you've seen him/her?" etc.
RECAPTURING THE MAGICAL MOMENTS
My Buddies, Leez and Yan =>>
Our Meal =>>
"Something" for them to remember me by =>>
Enjoying Our Dinner =>>
Exchanging Business Cards =>>
Window Shopping =>>
Till we meet again, Take care, dear!
From :-
Monday, May 25, 2009
The Magic of Facebook
As a social utility that connects people with friends and others who work, study and live around them, Facebook has truly re-connected me with my old friends. In this Facebook age, no one needs to wait a decade to reunite with our dearly ones. With its ability to track down long-lost friends and share messages and photos, Facebook is its own non-stop virtual reunion. Facebook appeals to people who are looking to be reconnected with their old friends and family members, or find new friends online; and the mash up of features like email, instant messaging, image and video sharing has certainly spark up this connections.
MY FACEBOOK =>>
(The link to My Facebook is now situated on the right hand side of this blog under MY NETWORK)
After decades of searching for my long lost friends, I've finally managed to track them down via Facebook. Wasn't it magical? How technology has actually reunited us together after such a long period of time. Thank you, Sul for contacting Leez for me. And also, Zue.....! You know what, Zue, I've almost lost hope in seeing you again, dear! Zue has been writing to me and sending me cards years after years without fail, ever since we are apart, and when she suddenly stops doing this, my mind starts to wonder, whatever have actually happen to my dearest friend! Luckily, my instinct droves me to search for her in the Facebook yesterday, and I've finally managed to track her down. For me, it was truly magical, indeed...! Just like a dream comes true! Nevertheless, I'm still anxiously waiting for at least three other friends to join us in the Facebook : Azian, Azila, and Amtul. (We used to call ourselves, "The Secret Six" (remember those sweet times, dear? ;-)).
Other than re connecting myself with my beloved buddies, I also managed to join my School and University Alumni. (Also linked under MY NETWORK). And this is really great!
As a tribute to my beloved friends, let us refresh our fondest memories to our good old times together..........
At the teachers' room (Staff Room) after the rehearsel (for our school concert) =>
Our best Tuition Class ever, with Mr. Ho, affectionately known as "Pak Ho" =>
Getting ready for our School Concert =>
After the School Concert =>
Sports' Day =>
A Campfire with the Edwardians Boys =>
Specially dedicated to ;
The Secret Six :
Me, Zuraidah, Norliza, Azian, Amtul and Azila... Love and miss all of you dearly!
Looking forward for a mini reunion soon, girls..!
From :
MY FACEBOOK =>>
(The link to My Facebook is now situated on the right hand side of this blog under MY NETWORK)
After decades of searching for my long lost friends, I've finally managed to track them down via Facebook. Wasn't it magical? How technology has actually reunited us together after such a long period of time. Thank you, Sul for contacting Leez for me. And also, Zue.....! You know what, Zue, I've almost lost hope in seeing you again, dear! Zue has been writing to me and sending me cards years after years without fail, ever since we are apart, and when she suddenly stops doing this, my mind starts to wonder, whatever have actually happen to my dearest friend! Luckily, my instinct droves me to search for her in the Facebook yesterday, and I've finally managed to track her down. For me, it was truly magical, indeed...! Just like a dream comes true! Nevertheless, I'm still anxiously waiting for at least three other friends to join us in the Facebook : Azian, Azila, and Amtul. (We used to call ourselves, "The Secret Six" (remember those sweet times, dear? ;-)).
Other than re connecting myself with my beloved buddies, I also managed to join my School and University Alumni. (Also linked under MY NETWORK). And this is really great!
As a tribute to my beloved friends, let us refresh our fondest memories to our good old times together..........
At the teachers' room (Staff Room) after the rehearsel (for our school concert) =>
Our best Tuition Class ever, with Mr. Ho, affectionately known as "Pak Ho" =>
Getting ready for our School Concert =>
After the School Concert =>
Sports' Day =>
A Campfire with the Edwardians Boys =>
Specially dedicated to ;
The Secret Six :
Me, Zuraidah, Norliza, Azian, Amtul and Azila... Love and miss all of you dearly!
Looking forward for a mini reunion soon, girls..!
From :
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Making Wise Decisions
A wise decision is one that is empowering and produces results that benefit not only yourself, but the other important people in your life as well. How you’re living your life is a direct result of the day-to-day choices you’re making. Simply put, the wiser your choices, the more empowered your life is.
How Do You Make Wise Choices?
Here are some steps and suggestions that may help:
1. Make your choices based on your core values and beliefs. Don't try to do something you truly believe is wrong. Know what is important to you physically, emotionally and spiritually and then refuse to compromise your integrity. Listen to your inner values and beliefs and act accordingly.
2. Know what you want and why you want it. Stay focused on what's important to achieving your goals. If your "why" is big enough, you'll make the wise choices that will keep you going forward. Understanding and being able to tap into your values and beliefs will give you the self-confidence to know what is best now and into the future.
3. Listen to your instincts. Instincts can play an important role in wise decision-making. Listen to the physical signs - stomachaches, headaches, procrastination - they may be giving you valuable clues. Listen to the emotional signs - nagging feelings of uncertainty, restlessness - your emotions are telling you something powerful. Instinctively you know what is best, start trusting your "guts."
4. Eliminate self-doubt. With healthy self-esteem comes the self-confidence to trust in yourself and your decision-making skills. The past doesn’t equal the future. Learn from the past and head positively forward. Seek out advice or counsel if you feel it is necessary. List the pros and cons of the decision you want to make and then trust you’ll make the right choices.
5. Face facts. Face the facts as they are today. Realistically form a plan that will successfully take you from where you are now to where you want to be in the future. Trust in your ability to make wise decisions. Start from where you are today and go forward!
6. Form a support network with other empowered like-minded people. You don’t have to go it alone. When you share your hopes, dreams and goals with people who also believe in success, it can be a tremendous boost to your self-confidence. Rule of thumb: Listen to the suggestions of others but remember, the ultimate decisions are yours. Listen to your core values and be aware of your instincts. Make the choices that are best for you and your current situation.
Learning to make the right decisions at the right time is a powerful skill. It's not always easy to make a smart choice, especially in times of stress or pressure.The best decision-making tool of all is an unwavering belief in yourself. A positive belief system fosters and nurtures the confidence that you can and will make smart choices and wise decisions.
Read more: http://personaldevelopment.suite101.com/article.cfm/how_to_make_wise_decisions#ixzz0GPlN34Uk&B
How Do You Make Wise Choices?
Here are some steps and suggestions that may help:
1. Make your choices based on your core values and beliefs. Don't try to do something you truly believe is wrong. Know what is important to you physically, emotionally and spiritually and then refuse to compromise your integrity. Listen to your inner values and beliefs and act accordingly.
2. Know what you want and why you want it. Stay focused on what's important to achieving your goals. If your "why" is big enough, you'll make the wise choices that will keep you going forward. Understanding and being able to tap into your values and beliefs will give you the self-confidence to know what is best now and into the future.
3. Listen to your instincts. Instincts can play an important role in wise decision-making. Listen to the physical signs - stomachaches, headaches, procrastination - they may be giving you valuable clues. Listen to the emotional signs - nagging feelings of uncertainty, restlessness - your emotions are telling you something powerful. Instinctively you know what is best, start trusting your "guts."
4. Eliminate self-doubt. With healthy self-esteem comes the self-confidence to trust in yourself and your decision-making skills. The past doesn’t equal the future. Learn from the past and head positively forward. Seek out advice or counsel if you feel it is necessary. List the pros and cons of the decision you want to make and then trust you’ll make the right choices.
5. Face facts. Face the facts as they are today. Realistically form a plan that will successfully take you from where you are now to where you want to be in the future. Trust in your ability to make wise decisions. Start from where you are today and go forward!
6. Form a support network with other empowered like-minded people. You don’t have to go it alone. When you share your hopes, dreams and goals with people who also believe in success, it can be a tremendous boost to your self-confidence. Rule of thumb: Listen to the suggestions of others but remember, the ultimate decisions are yours. Listen to your core values and be aware of your instincts. Make the choices that are best for you and your current situation.
Learning to make the right decisions at the right time is a powerful skill. It's not always easy to make a smart choice, especially in times of stress or pressure.The best decision-making tool of all is an unwavering belief in yourself. A positive belief system fosters and nurtures the confidence that you can and will make smart choices and wise decisions.
Read more: http://personaldevelopment.suite101.com/article.cfm/how_to_make_wise_decisions#ixzz0GPlN34Uk&B
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Laws of Work
Laws of Work
* If you can't get your work done in the first 24 hours, work nights.
* A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the butt.
* Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
* It doesn't matter what you do, it only matters what you say you've done and what you're going to do.
* After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before.
* The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.
* You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.
* Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.
* When the bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking about themselves.
* If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.
* There will always be beer cans rolling on the floor of your car when the boss asks for a ride home from the office.
* Keep your boss's boss off your boss's back.
* Everything can be filed under "miscellaneous."
* Never delay the ending of a meeting or the beginning of a cocktail hour.
* To err is human, to forgive is not our policy.
* Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he/she is supposed to be doing.
* Important letters that contain no errors will develop errors in the mail.
* If you are good, you will be assigned all the work. If you are really good, you will get out of it.
* You are always doing something marginal when the boss drops by your desk.
* People who go to conferences are the ones who shouldn't.
* If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done.
* At work, the authority of a person is inversely proportional to the number of pens that person is carrying.
* When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.
* Following the rules will not get the job done.
* Getting the job done is no excuse for not following the rules.
* When confronted by a difficult problem you can solve it more easily by reducing it to the question, "How would the Lone Ranger handle this?"
* No matter how much you do, you never do enough.
* The last person that quit or was fired will be held responsible for everything that goes wrong.
Source : http://www.joke-archives.com/
* If you can't get your work done in the first 24 hours, work nights.
* A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the butt.
* Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
* It doesn't matter what you do, it only matters what you say you've done and what you're going to do.
* After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before.
* The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.
* You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.
* Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.
* When the bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking about themselves.
* If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.
* There will always be beer cans rolling on the floor of your car when the boss asks for a ride home from the office.
* Keep your boss's boss off your boss's back.
* Everything can be filed under "miscellaneous."
* Never delay the ending of a meeting or the beginning of a cocktail hour.
* To err is human, to forgive is not our policy.
* Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he/she is supposed to be doing.
* Important letters that contain no errors will develop errors in the mail.
* If you are good, you will be assigned all the work. If you are really good, you will get out of it.
* You are always doing something marginal when the boss drops by your desk.
* People who go to conferences are the ones who shouldn't.
* If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done.
* At work, the authority of a person is inversely proportional to the number of pens that person is carrying.
* When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.
* Following the rules will not get the job done.
* Getting the job done is no excuse for not following the rules.
* When confronted by a difficult problem you can solve it more easily by reducing it to the question, "How would the Lone Ranger handle this?"
* No matter how much you do, you never do enough.
* The last person that quit or was fired will be held responsible for everything that goes wrong.
Source : http://www.joke-archives.com/
The 'Be' Attitudes
* Be understanding to your enemies.
* Be loyal to your friends.
* Be strong enough to face the world each day.
* Be weak enough to know you cannot do everything alone.
* Be generous to those who need your help.
* Be frugal with that you need yourself.
* Be wise enough to know that you do not know everything.
* Be foolish enough to believe in miracles.
* Be willing to share your joys.
* Be willing to share the sorrows of others.
* Be a leader when you see a path others have missed.
* Be a follower when you are shrouded by the mists of uncertainty.
* Be first to congratulate an opponent who succeeds.
* Be last to criticize a colleague who fails.
* Be sure where your next step will fall, so that you will not tumble.
* Be sure of your final destination, in case you are going the wrong way.
* Be loving to those who love you.
* Be loving to those who do not love you; they may change.
* Above all, be yourself.
Source : http://www.joke-archives.com/
Friday, May 22, 2009
Things You Can Do While Waiting In Line
Time is precious. Sometimes we can get really bored while waiting in line at a store or at any appointment. Here are several things that you can do to optimize your quality time while waiting.
1. Plan. If you are at a place in your day where you have either finished the tasks that needed time management, or if you have set your goals, then find a way to move on to the next task and plan what needs to be done next. By setting new goals and time limits, you will be able to find a way to continue to reach your goals for the rest of your day.
2. Refocus. If you have a busy schedule, use the time that you are waiting to refocus. Go over your schedule for the day, find what you need to do for the rest of the day, and figure out what to do to re-manage your time. If you have a handheld device or a notebook with a list, you can look over what your list has for the day, as well as what your goals are.
3. Make more lists. If you find that several of your goals have been reached for the day, or if you want to move forward onto a different task, making a different list or rearranging the list that you already have is an easy thing to do while you are waiting. Once you are out of the line or have stepped out of your appointment, you will know exactly what needs to get done next.
4. Organize your time. If you have your calendar with you, and have already set your lists, then figure out how much time it will take you to complete the tasks and goals that you have on your schedule for that day. Planning out how long it will take you to finish your tasks of the day is an effective use of time while waiting in line or waiting for an appointment.
5. Bring mail or correspondence to sort through. If you have mail that will need to go out to friends, or things that you need to organize, you can bring these with you. While you are waiting, it is an easy thing to sort through or read while waiting.
6. Make phone calls. If you have business partners or friends that need you to call them, this is a great time to do so. Because you are waiting in line, you will be able to keep the phone calls short and to the point.
7. Bring along the smaller tasks. Sometimes, there are smaller things that need to be completed or looked through. If you need to finish a smaller task, doing so while waiting in line is a great time to catch up on what you may have not necessarily have done when the focus was on the larger tasks and goals that were set for the day.
8. Re-energize. If the day is particularly busy for you, this is a good time to not do anything except wait. Use waiting time as a time to calm down, find your focus, and relax. Downtime is always good and necessary in any day that is full of activities and planning.
9. Read. If you know that your wait is going to be longer, you can catch up on reading that you need to do. This can help you relax. You can also read things that will help you with your progress for the rest of the day. Reading can often keep you on track for the rest of your day as well.
10. Catch up on the news. Many different places will have magazines and newspapers available right by the check out stand, or wherever you are waiting. If you don’t bring your own material to read, it’s always good to keep up with the latest news and happenings in the world. This is good to do if you have already organized the rest of your day and made your plans.
Make sure that you always bring along your planning devices, or any smaller tasks that you will have to do for the rest of the day. This will help you in never having to stand in line or wait for a long amount of time without having anything to do.
Wherever you are waiting, it is always a good time to reschedule, re-energize and continue with your lists and plans that need to be organized for the rest of the day. By using waiting time as a way to continue setting your goals, the rest of your day will run smoothly and more effectively as you are able to continue with your plans.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
The Road To Success
If you want to gain success in life, then you have to take action. Most people don’t achieve any success life due to the lack of action.
Think about your dreams and your future goals. Decide and plan your weekly, monthly, yearly goals. Figure out where you want to be in next five years. What do you want to leave behind in this world after you leave? In order to become something, you will have to make your goals high and challenge yourself to achieve them.
You must assess your present situation and find out your strength and weaknesses. Find out the fields where you need to make some improvements. You must also assess the things to you need to get rid of to turn your dreams into reality.
Prioritize – you must prioritize your actions which will get you ahead quickly. Make a list of things which will have long term effect on your future. You must build a sustainable and stable foundation for your goals.
You must aim high. Your target should be challenging but achievable. Don’t set unrealistic targets for yourself. You should keep communicating your thoughts with the concerned people. You must make sure that your entire associates share and agree with your vision.
Decide the people you want to work with and make sure that they agree to work you and the stay committed with you.
Never use negative language because if your associates think that you are confident about your vision, then they will also work hard to achieve the goals. You must have a confident and positive mentality. You must encourage the people around you to think of problems as just a challenge. You must teach them to find a solution of every problem.
Communication is also very important. Make a communication line that connects every level of your organization. You must divide your priorities into small sections and distribute them among your team. Inform your team about the expectations from them and create a timetable for each task.
Make sure that your staff takes up the responsibility and performs it well. For this, you will also have to ensure that your staff is fully trained and knows its job. Keep reviewing and monitoring the performance of your staff, in order to evaluate its performance and make necessary changes.
Don’t be egoistic. A person with a high ego will never get any success in life.
In the end, it is very necessary to celebrate your success and show your gratitude towards people who have contributed in your success. Give the responsible people due credit. Be honest with your staff and give them regular and useful feedback to them.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Aakash_Shah
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Dealing With Frustrations
Frustration is a feeling of dissatisfaction often accompanied by anxiety or depression, resulting from unfulfilled needs or unresolved problems. When you feel that your efforts are being blocked or cannot be achieved, it is quite common to become frustrated. The emotion of frustration is experienced when you feel that your efforts are not producing rewards. When we make an effort at something and it doesn't reap the desired result, we may end up feeling as if our time and energy is being spent to no avail and that our efforts are worthless. Anger, irritation and discouragement may accompany the feeling. Modern living also contributes significantly to feeling frustrated – increased workloads, managing family, financial and social responsibilities, technology and the crime rate in your country.
What Causes Frustration?
Depending on the situation and circumstances, frustration is generally the outcome of negative emotions and varies from person to person. Very often you may experience a range of negative emotions such as anger, resentment, annoyance, jealousy, distrust, or envy as a result of the frustration. Everyday situations can bring about frustration – for example, being in stuck in traffic makes you late for an important meeting or your child needs your help completing a school project but only tells you about it one day before it is due.
People often experience personal frustration when they are dealing with their own weaknesses, insecurities and inabilities. For instance if you and your partner are encountering a communication breakdown, frustration often sets in when both of you fail to connect with each other. Misinterpreting a situation or overanalyzing what someone said can cause unwanted levels of frustration.
If frustration is not dealt with effectively, it can lead to more serious emotional issues such as anxiety, depression, phobias, loneliness and loss of self worth. For this reason, maintaining a positive outlook on life by not sweating the small stuff, creating a balanced lifestyle and learning to relax and having a bit of fun can make a huge difference in managing your levels of frustration.
Here are some simple and effective ways you can use to deal with frustrations and release negative feelings without anger:
• Express your emotions in a healthy way by talking about your feelings (what is bothering you) to someone that you trust
• Get active – release frustration and tension by exercising, running, kickboxing, dancing or hitting a punching bag or pillow
• Clear your mind by going to a quiet place where you can think – a long walk on the beach or drive will help you to gain renewed perspective
• Set realistic goals and expectations for yourself and others. In this way, you will avoid unnecessary disappointment and not put so much pressure on yourself
• Keep a journal where you write down your thoughts – by doing this you are organizing your thought patterns and
• Stop complaining about what is frustrating you and do something positive about it. If you find that there is nothing that you can do about it, then it is time that you realize that you are achieving nothing by becoming frustrated
• Stay positive, try to remain upbeat and look on the brighter side of things. Being negative will just draw into feeling hopeless and depressed
• Try not to take things personally – sometimes someone’s behavior is not directed towards you even though you may think that. Very often people tend to be very wrapped up in themselves and their actions towards you are a result of their own mind set.
• Have a good, old cry – by releasing all that pent up emotion will immediately make you feel better.
What Causes Frustration?
Depending on the situation and circumstances, frustration is generally the outcome of negative emotions and varies from person to person. Very often you may experience a range of negative emotions such as anger, resentment, annoyance, jealousy, distrust, or envy as a result of the frustration. Everyday situations can bring about frustration – for example, being in stuck in traffic makes you late for an important meeting or your child needs your help completing a school project but only tells you about it one day before it is due.
People often experience personal frustration when they are dealing with their own weaknesses, insecurities and inabilities. For instance if you and your partner are encountering a communication breakdown, frustration often sets in when both of you fail to connect with each other. Misinterpreting a situation or overanalyzing what someone said can cause unwanted levels of frustration.
If frustration is not dealt with effectively, it can lead to more serious emotional issues such as anxiety, depression, phobias, loneliness and loss of self worth. For this reason, maintaining a positive outlook on life by not sweating the small stuff, creating a balanced lifestyle and learning to relax and having a bit of fun can make a huge difference in managing your levels of frustration.
Here are some simple and effective ways you can use to deal with frustrations and release negative feelings without anger:
• Express your emotions in a healthy way by talking about your feelings (what is bothering you) to someone that you trust
• Get active – release frustration and tension by exercising, running, kickboxing, dancing or hitting a punching bag or pillow
• Clear your mind by going to a quiet place where you can think – a long walk on the beach or drive will help you to gain renewed perspective
• Set realistic goals and expectations for yourself and others. In this way, you will avoid unnecessary disappointment and not put so much pressure on yourself
• Keep a journal where you write down your thoughts – by doing this you are organizing your thought patterns and
• Stop complaining about what is frustrating you and do something positive about it. If you find that there is nothing that you can do about it, then it is time that you realize that you are achieving nothing by becoming frustrated
• Stay positive, try to remain upbeat and look on the brighter side of things. Being negative will just draw into feeling hopeless and depressed
• Try not to take things personally – sometimes someone’s behavior is not directed towards you even though you may think that. Very often people tend to be very wrapped up in themselves and their actions towards you are a result of their own mind set.
• Have a good, old cry – by releasing all that pent up emotion will immediately make you feel better.
Taking Someone For Granted
Taking someone for granted means……
……not cherishing the things someone does for you…
……expecting everything from someone and not giving the same in return
……never being satisfied with what one has and what one offered, and constantly demand for ’something else’
…… not appreciating a person for who they are
…… wanting them to be someone else
…..and unfortunately, more often than not, people don’t even realize when they are taking someone for granted……at least not until it’s too late.
Every one of us, at some point or another, are guilty of believing that people we care about will always be there for us, and will always be available. Sometimes, this isn't necessarily be so. Our mothers, fathers, family, and friends are the core that we interact with everyday. We must always realize that there are no guarantees that each one of them will be available to us at will. By thinking that they will always be there, we can very easily take them for granted. The good deeds and contributions that they make to our lives can sometimes go by unnoticed.
We casually can mutter a phrase like "Mom's always there", "Anne's a great friend", "Isn't Dad great?" like a programmed response with not a second thought to it. We begin to expect that certain people will “always” be there. We forget to be thankful to them for what they do, for being there, for taking the time to care and unfortunately even begin to neglect the relationship that we have. Many of us have a tendency to put off things we want to say and do until tomorrow without realizing that sometimes we could be run out of tomorrows!
Perhaps one day, out of the blue, the phone doesn't ring anymore, the e mails stop coming in, that familiar voice no longer there,......the person is already gone! At that point of time, we begin to realize just how much we've lost our dearly “someone”. The space that's left in our lives, that was once full, is now empty. Regret starts creeping into our thoughts that maybe we didn't say enough to this particular person, while they were still alive.
Even though it is very hard, and sometimes impossible to change the past, we can certainly change the present. Look around....think about who in your life contributes to your development on a regular basis...and those that you, too, help. "Thank you" is not a very difficult phrase to say...but its meaning to a given person can be tremendous. It's okay to tell people how much you need them, care for them and how much you love them with all your heart. Do it while they're here before its……TOO LATE!
……not cherishing the things someone does for you…
……expecting everything from someone and not giving the same in return
……never being satisfied with what one has and what one offered, and constantly demand for ’something else’
…… not appreciating a person for who they are
…… wanting them to be someone else
…..and unfortunately, more often than not, people don’t even realize when they are taking someone for granted……at least not until it’s too late.
Every one of us, at some point or another, are guilty of believing that people we care about will always be there for us, and will always be available. Sometimes, this isn't necessarily be so. Our mothers, fathers, family, and friends are the core that we interact with everyday. We must always realize that there are no guarantees that each one of them will be available to us at will. By thinking that they will always be there, we can very easily take them for granted. The good deeds and contributions that they make to our lives can sometimes go by unnoticed.
We casually can mutter a phrase like "Mom's always there", "Anne's a great friend", "Isn't Dad great?" like a programmed response with not a second thought to it. We begin to expect that certain people will “always” be there. We forget to be thankful to them for what they do, for being there, for taking the time to care and unfortunately even begin to neglect the relationship that we have. Many of us have a tendency to put off things we want to say and do until tomorrow without realizing that sometimes we could be run out of tomorrows!
Perhaps one day, out of the blue, the phone doesn't ring anymore, the e mails stop coming in, that familiar voice no longer there,......the person is already gone! At that point of time, we begin to realize just how much we've lost our dearly “someone”. The space that's left in our lives, that was once full, is now empty. Regret starts creeping into our thoughts that maybe we didn't say enough to this particular person, while they were still alive.
Even though it is very hard, and sometimes impossible to change the past, we can certainly change the present. Look around....think about who in your life contributes to your development on a regular basis...and those that you, too, help. "Thank you" is not a very difficult phrase to say...but its meaning to a given person can be tremendous. It's okay to tell people how much you need them, care for them and how much you love them with all your heart. Do it while they're here before its……TOO LATE!
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
The Importance of Punctuality
“Punctuality is the politeness of princes” is a proverb. There is another proverb which says, “Punctuality is the virtue of kings.” Here,‘punctuality’ is the catch word. Isn’t it surprising that even in the days of absolute monarchy ,princes and kings themselves valued punctuality as a great virtue and practiced it? It is said that benevolent kings who valued the love and trust of their subjects considered punctuality as an important virtue and the practice of this virtue earned them immense popularity. On reflection this appears to be quite right.It is the outcome of their sensibility and refinement. Cultured people can never even think of causing the least inconvenience to others in any way. To keep someone waiting for us is a sure sign of discourtesy.
Punctuality is the habit of doing things exactly in time. A punctual person will be a winner everywhere. A punctual person is always one step ahead of others. Often we say plan work and work plan. But if you are not stick on your work promptly, punctually, how can you become a better person in your life? Punctuality is essential for man in every walk of life. For students it is a great blessing. If you are punctual you will get enough time to do your work according to your plan. In hospitals, punctuality can make all the difference, of course between life and death.
You never face any difficulty so far as time is concerned. You command respect and admiration of all who work with you and are an asset. Everybody likes to work with such a lovely man. On the contrary an unpunctual man sees himself in arrears as days pass and is gradually filled with despair. He generally causes inconvenience to others and is most of the time a liability. Punctuality is inevitable everywhere. In business also this is very important. If you want to be a successful businessman, you have to be very particular in being punctual. The failure to keep up an engagement punctually may mean a setback for his business. If you are not punctual, you can see your washes away between your cup and lip!
If we study the lives of our great men, we find that punctuality was one of the secrets of their success in life. The necessity of doing our work punctually should be felt more keenly because we live today in a complicated society where each work is dependent on the other. The smooth working of the modern world is due to an increasing recognition of the necessity of doing our work punctually. Punctuality being so important in life, it is necessary for every man to cultivate this habit from the very beginning.
Punctuality is a problem for many people. Time management, or course, is key to punctuality. Knowing when to do certain activities by planning ahead can make a big difference as to whether or not you are late. For instance, if you are constantly late to work because you have too many things to do in the morning (shower, shave, brush teeth, make your lunch, feed the dog, etc.), think about which things could be done the night before, such as preparing your lunch and keeping it in the fridge, or having your outfit already picked out. Lateness is a sign of poor time management skills. When you are late for appointments, meetings or work, you show a lack of respect for other people’s time as well as your own.
How can we ensure that we keep appointments by arriving on time? Here are some suggestions:
1. Make up your mind that you will be punctual from now on. In many cases lateness is caused by a lack of commitment to arrive on time. Have the right mindset.
2. Record the commitment in your planner and also record the time you must leave the house or office in order to arrive on time. Plan to arrive 5 to 10 minutes early.
3. If you have a fair distance to travel, always allow more time than you think it will take.
4. Don’t be trapped by the one last thing syndrome. If you’re ready to leave and it's still early, leave anyway. Utilize the time at the other end rather than trying to finish one more task before you leave.
5. If you are not a morning person, but have early morning commitments, set the alarm a little earlier. Some of us may need to go to bed a little earlier to make this work.
When it comes right down to it, punctuality is a habit that can be developed. It takes great effort at first, but eventually simply happens. Habits are formed by repetition. If you want to acquire the habit of punctuality, you must repeat this behavior again and again.
Source: Archives of CaravanDotCom &
http://www.peerpapers.com/essays/Importance-Punctuality/117879.html
http://www.oppapers.com/essays/Importance-Of-Punctuality/194688
Punctuality is the habit of doing things exactly in time. A punctual person will be a winner everywhere. A punctual person is always one step ahead of others. Often we say plan work and work plan. But if you are not stick on your work promptly, punctually, how can you become a better person in your life? Punctuality is essential for man in every walk of life. For students it is a great blessing. If you are punctual you will get enough time to do your work according to your plan. In hospitals, punctuality can make all the difference, of course between life and death.
You never face any difficulty so far as time is concerned. You command respect and admiration of all who work with you and are an asset. Everybody likes to work with such a lovely man. On the contrary an unpunctual man sees himself in arrears as days pass and is gradually filled with despair. He generally causes inconvenience to others and is most of the time a liability. Punctuality is inevitable everywhere. In business also this is very important. If you want to be a successful businessman, you have to be very particular in being punctual. The failure to keep up an engagement punctually may mean a setback for his business. If you are not punctual, you can see your washes away between your cup and lip!
If we study the lives of our great men, we find that punctuality was one of the secrets of their success in life. The necessity of doing our work punctually should be felt more keenly because we live today in a complicated society where each work is dependent on the other. The smooth working of the modern world is due to an increasing recognition of the necessity of doing our work punctually. Punctuality being so important in life, it is necessary for every man to cultivate this habit from the very beginning.
Punctuality is a problem for many people. Time management, or course, is key to punctuality. Knowing when to do certain activities by planning ahead can make a big difference as to whether or not you are late. For instance, if you are constantly late to work because you have too many things to do in the morning (shower, shave, brush teeth, make your lunch, feed the dog, etc.), think about which things could be done the night before, such as preparing your lunch and keeping it in the fridge, or having your outfit already picked out. Lateness is a sign of poor time management skills. When you are late for appointments, meetings or work, you show a lack of respect for other people’s time as well as your own.
How can we ensure that we keep appointments by arriving on time? Here are some suggestions:
1. Make up your mind that you will be punctual from now on. In many cases lateness is caused by a lack of commitment to arrive on time. Have the right mindset.
2. Record the commitment in your planner and also record the time you must leave the house or office in order to arrive on time. Plan to arrive 5 to 10 minutes early.
3. If you have a fair distance to travel, always allow more time than you think it will take.
4. Don’t be trapped by the one last thing syndrome. If you’re ready to leave and it's still early, leave anyway. Utilize the time at the other end rather than trying to finish one more task before you leave.
5. If you are not a morning person, but have early morning commitments, set the alarm a little earlier. Some of us may need to go to bed a little earlier to make this work.
When it comes right down to it, punctuality is a habit that can be developed. It takes great effort at first, but eventually simply happens. Habits are formed by repetition. If you want to acquire the habit of punctuality, you must repeat this behavior again and again.
Source: Archives of CaravanDotCom &
http://www.peerpapers.com/essays/Importance-Punctuality/117879.html
http://www.oppapers.com/essays/Importance-Of-Punctuality/194688
Monday, May 18, 2009
If You Love Somebody.....
If You Love Somebody......
I always thought the original saying was, "If you love something, set it free. If it doesn't come back to you, it wasn't yours to begin with." However, for the purposes of this test, let's use the proposed version. In which category do *you* fall?
The Old Version
If you love somebody, Set her free...
If she comes back, she's yours,
If she doesn't, she never was....
The New Versions
* Pessimist
If you love somebody, Set her free ...
If she ever comes back, she's yours,
If she doesn't, well, as expected, she never was.
* Optimist
If you love somebody, Set her free ...
Don't worry, she will come back.
* Suspicious
If you love somebody, Set her free ...
If she ever comes back, ask her why.
* Impatient
If you love somebody, Set her free ...
If she doesn't comes back within some time forget her.
* Patient
If you love somebody, Set her free ...
If she doesn't come back, continue to wait until she comes back ...
* Playful
If you love somebody, Set her free ...
* If she comes back, and if you love her still, set her free again,
repeat *
* Vengeful
If you love somebody, Set her free...
If she doesn't come back,
Hunt her down and shoot her.
* C++ Programmer
if(you-love(m_she)) m_she.free()
if(m_she == NULL)
m_she= new CShe;
* Animal-Rights Activist
If you love somebody, Set her free...
In fact, all living creatures deserve to be free!!
* Lawyers
If you love somebody, Set her free...
Clause 1a of Paragraph 13a-1 in the second amendment of the
Matrimonial Freedom Act clearly states that...
* Bill Gates
If you love somebody, Set her free...
If she comes back, I think we can charge her for re-installation fees
and but tell her that she's also going to get an upgrade.
* Biologist
If you love somebody, Set her free...
She'll evolve.
* Statistician
If you love somebody, Set her free...
If she loves you, the probability of her coming back is high,
If she doesn't, your relation was improbable anyway.
* Schwarzenegger's Fan
If you love somebody, Set her free...
SHE'LL BE BACK!
* Overpossessive
If you love somebody don't set her free.
* HR Specialist
If you love somebody set her free
By Offering her VRS and other benefits, then outsource her.
* MBA
If you love somebody set her free...
instantaneously...and look for others simultaneously
* Psychologist
If you love somebody set her free...
If she comes back, her super ego is dominant
If she doesn't come, back her id is supreme
If she doesn't go, she must be crazy.
* Somnambulist
If you love somebody set her free...
If she comes back, it's a nightmare
If she doesn't, you must be dreaming.
* Rhett Butler
If you love somebody set YOURSELF FREE
If she asks you why say you don't give a damn.
* ERP Functional Expert
If you love somebody set her free...
If she comes back, map her into your system
If she doesn't, carry out a gap-fit analysis
* Finance Expert
If you love somebody set her free...
If she comes back, its time to look fresh loans.
If she doesn't, write her off as an asset gone bad.
* Marketing Expert
If you love somebody set her free...
If she comes back, she has brand loyalty
If she doesn't, reposition the brand in new markets.
Source : http://www.joke-archives.com/
Sunday, May 17, 2009
The Five Toughest Questions
1. What are you thinking about?
2. Do you love me?
3. Do I look fat?
4. Do you think she is prettier than me?
5. What would you do if I died?
What makes these questions so difficult is that every one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrectly (i.e., tells the truth).
* Question #1: What are you thinking about?
The proper answer to this, of course, is: "I'm sorry if I've been pensive, dear. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, thoughtful, caring, intelligent woman you are, and how lucky I am to have met you." This response obviously bears no resemblance to the true answer, which most likely is one of the following:
1. Baseball.
2. Football.
3. How fat you are.
4. How much prettier she is than you.
5. How I would spend the insurance money if you died. (Perhaps the best response to this question was offered by Al Bundy, who once told Peg, "If I wanted you to know what I was thinking, I would be talking to you!")
* Question #2: Do you love me?
The proper response is: "YES!" or, if you feel a more detailed answer is in order, "Yes, dear." Inappropriate responses include:
1. I suppose so.
2. Would it make you feel better if I said yes?
3. That depends on what you mean by love.
4. Does it matter?
5. Who, me?
* Question #3: Do I look fat?
The correct answer is an emphatic: "Of course not!" Among the incorrect answers are:
1. Compared to what?
2. I wouldn't call you fat, but you're not exactly thin.
3. A little extra weight looks good on you.
4. I've seen fatter.
5. Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.
* Question #4: Do you think she's prettier than me?
Once again, the proper response is an emphatic: "Of course not!" Incorrect responses include:
1. Yes, but you have a better personality
2. Not prettier, but definitely thinner
3. Not as pretty as you when you were her age
4. Define pretty
5. Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.
* Question# 5: What would you do if I died?
A definite no-win question. (The real answer, or course, is "Buy a Corvette.") No matter how you answer this, be prepared for at least an hour of follow-up questions, usually along the these lines:
Woman: Would you get married again?
Man: Definitely not!
W: Why not, don't you like being married?
M: Of course I do.
W: Then why wouldn't you remarry?
M: Okay, I'd get married again.
W: You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)
M: Yes, I would.
W: Would you sleep with her in our bed?
M: Where else would we sleep?
W: Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with pictures of her?
M: That would seem like the proper thing to do.
W: And would you let her use my golf clubs?
M: Of course not, Dear. She's left-handed.
Source : http://www.joke-archives.com/
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